5 Simple Steps to Boost Confidence and Escape the Comparison Cylcone
How many of you are secretly struggling with a way to make yourself feel better about the way you look, your financial situation, your fitness level, your job? It's so so insanely easy to look at our friends (IRL and online) and think that what we have is woefully inadequate compared to theirs. I catch myself falling into the comparison trap almost daily, mostly with girls living in Bali that are crazy tan and crazy attractive and seem insanely free. Over the years I've developed quick ways to pull myself out of that negative spiraling mindset. Yes, sometimes I need a good dose of tough love from my friends or my mom but 99% of the time one of these strategies will get me right back on the sunny side of life!
1. Become AWARE that there is a problem with the way you speak to yourself
The first step to healing is acknowledging you have a problem. Start to take notice of all the teeny mean thoughts that skitter across your brain every day. When you can, snatch it up and throw a positive one out instead. For example, "Oh God, look at that cellulite," probably didn't even take .3 seconds to think that. So stop that thought in it's tracks and instead think, "I got these legs from my Mom, and I love my Mom." Easy peasy. Replace the hatin' with some lovin'.
2. Accept compliments
Just say "Thanks!" and move on.
3. Give other people compliments- and mean it
"A flower does not think of competing with the flower next to it. It just blooms." This quote has become my mantra in the past year. It is so simple and so true. Acknowledging and complimenting someone else on their outfit, their idea in the morning meeting, or their dedication to their passions does NOT take away from your own qualities. In fact, when you give love you end up feeling good too. It is part of our biological wiring to enjoy making other people feel good. So enjoy that shot of endorphins and make someone smile today.
4. Pick out ONE thing each day that you appreciate about yourself. And keep giving that piece of yourself positive attention throughout the day.
So many people stress the importance of a morning or evening routine in which you acknowledge yourself for the good things you do. And that's great. But in all honesty it takes more than 5 minutes in the morning to change your mental state. You have to keep that 5 minutes going throughout the day. So whatever thought you meditate on in the morning, you must circle back to it throughout the day
5. Appreciate what you have
The Queen said it best, "You don't become what you want. You become what you believe." Yes I am talking about Oprah, she is the Queen. But seriously, read that sentence a few times and really digest it. You become what you believe. If you believe that your body is a wasteland of cellulite and grossness, that is your choice. You choose to perceive your body a certain way.
Incorporating these 5 habits into your daily life and behavior is one of the easiest ways to gain some genuine confidence in yourself. You don't need to lose 20 pounds before you can be confident. Confidence truly comes from within and radiates outward.
Let me know what you think about these tips in the comments! I would love to hear what you do to boost your confidence!
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